Happy Birthday Daddy

Yet another anniversary to remind me of my Dad. Like I need a reminder.

That sounds awful. The truth is, I miss my Dad often. It just seems more painful on special days. I so wish I could have called him today and said Happy Birthday. Even to hear him wheezing on the phone or coughing his head off would have been a comfort. Instead, I get to try to make it through a day in the office where everyone is going about business as usual. It's like the day he died in the hospital. The doctors and nurses were joking and going on about their lives. I didn't hate them for it. I just found it odd. I was in my bubble of despair and they were outside. We existed on different planes at that moment.

I looked up and said Happy Burthday Daddy. I'm not religious but the culture is ingrained in me. It was a prayer but not a prayer to a god. It was my expression.

My Dad loved me. Of that I am sure. I could find plenty of faults but in the end, I always had his love. I hope my daughter will be able to say that.